aggal73

I am just a little frustrated with myself.  My mind says I want to lose but my subconscious is content to stay the same or even creep up little by little. I know this is not what I want, but yet I allow it to happen.  I know at my current weight, I am not healthy.  I know someone who is my age and died of a random blood clot.  I don’t want that to be me.  I want to be healthy and happy, so why do I continue to half ass diet?  Well, that ends today.  My promises to myself include but are not limited to the following, I am posting them for everyone to see….

1.  Make a conscientious effort to balance my meals better.

2.  Weigh only once daily

3.  Consume only two diet cokes, etc per day…the rest is to be water.

4.  Do some kind of exercise daily,  I have to get moving……

 5.  Do not fill my body with CRAP.  If I have to totally exclude things like sweets because I can not control portion so be it. 

 I want to thank all of my buddies on here.  You are so supportive, even when I get on a whiny roll….Thanks Lyssa

Who in the heck came up with this concept anyway?  I became very depressed/frustrated/upset this morning when I tried on the new jeans I had bought…They were the same size I have been wearing…the same brand so why the heck couldn’t I get them over the thunder thighs?  They were even “stretch”.  I just didn’t get it until a friend of mine at work mentioned they might be straight legged jeans.  They just should not make a thing like that for plus size women.  I wonder how many they really sell ?!?!  Just my thought of the day, i better get to work…and just for you who wonder how the saga ended…i went and exchanged those bad boys for some REAL jeans….hope everyone has a good day

I hope everyone is having a good week.  I have not been that great in the food department this week.  I even brought what eventually would be my downfall (My mom’s favorite sweet treat to make).  My exercise has been non existent because of my shoulder, but on a positive note, it has stopped twinging and my emminent eye surgery is not so emminent this week anyway.  I will have to have it eventually but not this week as expected.  So back on track I go.  I am excited about next week going to Seattle next week.  I know already I will go through buddy slim withdrawl.  Maybe my hotel will have a computer I can get on, (i hope, i hope).  My email address is aggal73@yahoo.com if anyone wants to get me on my blackberry :)…..well gotta go walk now ….

It has been a stressful week for me.  I had some devastating financial issues (namely a crooked bank who slanted things to their favor by charging me almost 400.00 in fees) and I have injured my shoulder.  I guess I pulled something, I dont know.  All I know is that I have had this type of shoulder issue before on the right one (this time it is the left) and it can be quite painful and this has derailed my exercise efforts.  I even have trouble with the treadmill or the bicycle because any kind of “jostling” will irritate it. 

The point of this blog was that I was rifling through some papers last night and found a “journal” from December of just last year,  I was right at 200 which means I gained 25 pounds in the past 10 months when I had been claiming that I was dieting, what a bummer huh?  Well it is just a new resolve and commitment for me.  I have decided that this is unacceptable for me and I am definitely going to try and continue to do something about it.  I just can’t believe it crept on that fast.  I mean I knew I had put on the weight, but I hadn’t realized that it had been that fast. 

 On a non-weight related note, I was back to the eye doctor again yesterday.  I am looking at a possible 3rd surgery on my right eye.  I wonder how many times they can go in there like that.  I feel like after a while they would really mess things up.  I should be thankful it is only scar tissue and not something more serious.  Just a little bummed about that I guess.  If I would have known all the trouble this was going to be, I definitely would never had done it.

 Sorry to babble on so, but my dog needed to go out and I really haven’t had the time or motivation to blog this week, so it was all bottled up inside me :).  I hope all of my buddies have an awesome weekend and an awesome weigh in…I am pulling for you…even the Wildcats ..lol…Hot Rods are gonna win this week…

I have had a very frustrating day…..I went for a follow up on my lasik which is frustrating…My right eye is still jacked up.  I am back on steroid drops for a week…

Backstory…I had lasik in May…something went not so correctly with my right eye.  It seemed that they ripped a hole in my cornea when the removed a contact band aid after the surgery (this is my professional opinion anyway) so I had to have a second surgery on the right eye to patch the hole and get rid of the scar tissue…so things were going well and we were ready to go into the left eye for the second go round on my astigmatism (this was expected…from the beginning)..I am just frustrating and irritating.  I guess I should be thankful I am not blind !!!….

 Oh well thanks for listening buddies.  I will get  through this and I will do it without gaining any more weight.

I feel like I have been a bad buddy the past couple of weeks, but with a snap of my fingers and a kick in the a**, I am back.  An old friend of mine emailed me a couple of weeks ago and had joined my gym and invited me to work out.  It is the quickest thirty minutes of working out  three times a week.  I have lost almost 4 pounds since last Thursday and I know although this is not typical weight loss, I think it is a great “restart” and my last “do over”.  I am actually looking forward to both my team weigh in and my weight watcher weigh in.  So dont be surprised to see me online more. ….Woo Hoo..good luck to everyone and thanks for your support without you the restart might not have happened….